It is one of those days that everyone leaves early because they have to go attend the activities set for this evening. So right now, i am alone in the office, except for a dozen of cats outside the office that is roaming or lying along the halls right now.

It being a Saturday, it's been laidback the whole day. I get to work at the other room, where i feel very comfortable working in since it is quiet and i can look out of the window. Aside from that, i enjoy the company of my other co-worker there. There weren't much calls to answer, not much people to face. For me, that's a good thing. I like it when i don't have to face people much, when i am allowed to my own space and time. But of course, this being the case, i tend to feel sleepy as well.

Right now, a Tzu Chi Youth has just dropped by. He just came from school and had nothing to do before heading off to Hyatt for a meeting with i don't know who. He'll be keeping me company until 6pm. He actually came here to ask about the camp held last week by Tzu Chi for the youth, but since those who are in charge of it already left, well, there is nothing left to do. instead of just letting him to do nothing and wait for the time to come, i asked if he wanted to just count coins. He was willing, and so i let him do it. I won't be able to talk to him anyway since i barely know him.

Actually, i want to go home already. My momentum on translating has already gone by for the day. Yet, i must wait until the clock strikes exactly at 6pm, then i can leave, or that is when one of my officemates comes back to pick up his stuff.

Anyway, before i fall asleep, i'll just try finishing up the translation and leave the editing for monday. the newsletter for last quarter is way overdue and my feeling lazy now is not helping.

What a day.... when i feel like watch spiderman3, i am not even allowed. even if there is nothing to be done at home, everybody at their own stations watching their respective tv channels, i am not even allowed to go out.

What's wrong with wanting to watch a movie alone? And how about those sudden spontaneous urge to just watch a movie or just go out? Oh well... i did hate it... but anyway, because of that hate, wanting to just punch anything, i put that energy into some good use and just did 100 crunches, and another 100 of whatever you call it(good for strengthening the back).

Ultimate Expression

I'm about to burst
Yet there's no way out
All these feelings deep inside me
Just yearns to be free

Hiding me in myself
Hiding beneath the cloak
Of our facade
Too many faces, too many hidden messages

I want to be heard
I want to be seen
I want to be loved, and i want to love
by just being me

But however much i try to do so
I always pull myself back in
Afraid to be seen
As who i truly am

Will there ever be a right way?
Will there ever be an easy path?
Should i keep my peace and hide?
Hiding in the comfort of no friction?

Or to be free as i would like to be,
Despite the gritty pain i will face
Upon the unfurling of the truth
One that is true to oneself and the world?

Even words spoken here,
right at this very moment,
is hanging on the balance.
Should i speak or keep my peace?

And then again,
I will question myself again.
Another time,
Will the answer be different?

Still standing in the middle of the balance
Afraid to take either sides
One only falls either way
Yet what rises on the other side?

Rushing to get answers
Rushing to answer
Rushing to be free
Rushing to be me

through the journey of time and space,
Remembering memories of experiences
Living out the present experiences,
To look forward to what experiences are yet to come.
Will i have learned by then?

Or to take my time,
In picking the pieces
Of what is to make up
The Whole of ME.

Do i even need to prove myself?
Do i even need to present myself?
Or do i just live out who i am,
And that is all that needs to be?
The Ultimate Expression of ME?